Find Your Independence and Freedom: 3 Things That May be Holding You Back After Divorce

The day that you find out that your spouse wants a divorce can be one of the most heartbreaking (or to some people, the most joyous) days in a person’s life. Regardless, it can shake the very foundation of your life’s structure and routine, and if you’ve been the Chief Domestic Officer of your home, it’s normal to wonder what will come next.

It’s natural to go through a gamut of emotions: fear, anger, sadness, and uncertainty about the future. Once the divorce is finalized, many individuals might find they feel lost. Being the CDO isn’t quite the same as it used to be, and you might feel like you’re holding back from living a great life. Here are three important areas to consider that can help you unlock the independence and freedom you’re missing:

Are You Isolated?

Often times people can tend to isolate themselves post-divorce, whether it’s due to the shame or social stigma they fear, or they are just too upset to engage with the outside world. While it can initially be scary, venturing out to enjoy new experiences and meet new people can give you a newfound sense of independence.

Maybe you end up seeing old friends and decide to take a spontaneous road trip or you make plans down the line for a relaxing vacation. Remember, the world is your oyster. Breathe, and take a minute to enjoy that feeling of freedom.

Hanging on to the Past

It’s obvious that living your life in the past will prevent you from moving on to greener pastures and a healthier state of mind, but why do we do it? Maybe you were married for a long time and your previous life felt so familiar, and you’re afraid of what your new situation might bring. In any case, it takes time to heal from wounds and to adapt to change. Take the time to do so healthily, but living in the past is no way to live the rest of your life. Open yourself up to the fear of big changes and embrace it.

Take some time to honor your feelings and remember that you have the power to shape your own future now. Instead of living in an unhappy relationship you’re now free to make new decisions and embrace your independent spirit.

Taking Time for Self-Care

As Chief Domestic Officers, we often don’t prioritize making time for ourselves. With so much on our plates, our own needs often come at the end of the to-do list. After a divorce, there’s a pretty good chance that some of these responsibilities have been lifted from your shoulders—now is your opportunity to spend time on yourself and show yourself some love and appreciation for all that you do!

What hobbies did you enjoy that you haven’t engaged in for years? Are there classes you want to take to try something new? Allowing yourself to make your self-care a priority gives you the ability to explore your heart’s desires.

Alexandra Geczi Family Law is equipped to help you through every aspect of the divorce process, from the initial stages to getting you back to a life you enjoy. Call us today with your questions.

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Written by Alexandra Geczi

Alexandra Geczi

Alexandra Geczi is an attorney, mediator, and founding member of the firm, Alexandra Geczi PLLC | Family Law. Alexandra is also Owner/CEO of Chief Domestic Officer Solutions, an entity dedicated to enhancing the busy lives of stay at home spouses.