Can I Open My Spouse’s Mail During Divorce? What You Need to Know
Divorce can raise all kinds of practical questions, especially when spouses are still sharing a home. One question that frequently comes up is: Can I open my spouse’s mail during divorce if it’s delivered to our marital home? Whether you’re seeking information about bills, legal documents, or just dealing with the daily mail pile, it’s important to know the legal boundaries before taking action. In this blog post, we’ll break down everything you need to know about opening your spouse’s mail during divorce.
Is It Illegal to Open My Spouse’s Mail?
Yes, it can be.
Opening mail that is addressed solely to another person—even if that person is your spouse—can violate federal law. The key law here is:
18 U.S. Code § 1702 – Obstruction of Correspondence
This law makes it a federal offense to:
“Take any letter, postal card, or package out of any post office or authorized depository for mail matter, or from any letter or mail carrier, before it has been delivered to the person to whom it was directed, with design to obstruct the correspondence, or to pry into the business or secrets of another…”
In plain terms, this means:
- If a piece of mail is addressed only to your spouse, and
- You open it without their permission,
- You could be committing a federal crime, especially if there is intent to snoop, interfere, or gather information.
Even in a marriage, privacy laws apply. The fact that mail is delivered to a shared residence does not give you legal permission to open mail addressed to your spouse.
Can I Open Mail If My Spouse Has Moved Out?
If your spouse has moved out of the marital home, and mail addressed to them is still being delivered to your house, you should not open it.
Here are some best practices:
- Set the mail aside and do not open it.
- Notify your spouse in writing that their mail is still being delivered to the marital home and ask them to update their address with the post office.
- Do not throw away or tamper with their mail.
- If something looks urgent or legal, such as correspondence from an attorney or court, speak with your attorney about how to handle it.
Even if opening your spouse’s mail does not violate federal law or enforcement of the violation is not sought, opening their mail without permission can create unnecessary conflict and increase costs during the divorce.
Can I Open My Husband’s Mail If We’re Still Living Together During Divorce?
Even if you and your husband are still living in the same house, you should not open mail that is addressed solely to your spouse without his express permission.
Exceptions to Consider:
- If the mail is jointly addressed to both of you (e.g., “John and Jane Smith”), then it is typically acceptable for either of you to open it.
- If the mail is household-related (such as utility bills or mortgage statements) and addressed to your spouse, you may want to discuss how to handle those together—but still avoid opening them unless you’ve agreed to do so.
To avoid disputes:
- Communicate clearly about how to handle incoming mail.
- Encourage your spouse to set up a P.O. box if privacy is a concern.
Why Is This So Important During Divorce?
Divorce is a highly sensitive legal process, and even small missteps—like opening your spouse’s mail—can be used against you. For example:
- Your spouse may accuse you of invasion of privacy.
- If the mail contains legal or financial documents, tampering with it could affect the outcome of the case.
- You may be viewed as trying to gain an unfair advantage, especially if you’re gathering information for use in the divorce.
Maintaining integrity and transparency during divorce proceedings is critical to building trust with the court and protecting your credibility.
What Should I Do With My Spouse’s Mail?
If you continue to receive mail addressed to your spouse:
- Set it aside unopened. Do not open or destroy it.
- Notify your spouse via text or email and encourage them to update their mailing address.
- Talk to your lawyer if you’re unsure how to handle something specific.
For example, if you receive something that appears to be a legal notice or something related to the divorce, your attorney may be able to formally notify the opposing counsel without you opening the envelope.
What If My Spouse Is Opening My Mail During Divorce?
If you suspect your spouse is opening your mail without permission, you have options:
- Consider getting a P.O. box for private mail.
- Document any suspected instances (take photos of opened envelopes, etc.).
- Notify your attorney.
This kind of behavior can be addressed during your divorce proceedings and may be relevant to issues like property division or spousal conduct.
Can Opening Mail Affect My Divorce Case?
Yes. Even if criminal charges are unlikely, opening your spouse’s mail could have civil consequences or affect your standing in court.
For instance:
- It could reflect poorly on your credibility or character.
- It might be seen as part of a pattern of harassing or intrusive behavior.
- It could give your spouse grounds to request court orders for protection or exclusive possession of the home.
When in doubt, it’s better to err on the side of caution.
Final Thoughts: Opening Mail and Respecting Boundaries During Divorce
Divorce is as much about emotional and relational boundaries as it is about legal ones. Opening your spouse’s mail—no matter how tempting—can complicate your divorce and damage your position in the case.
The safest course of action? Don’t open it. Set it aside, notify your spouse, and speak to your attorney if you’re unsure what to do.
If you’re going through a divorce and have questions about what’s allowed and what’s not, consult with an experienced divorce attorney who can guide you through the legal nuances of your situation.
Need guidance through your divorce? If you have questions like, “Can I open my spouse’s mail during divorce?”, contact Alexandra Geczi PLLC today to schedule a consultation and protect your rights every step of the way. We are female divorce lawyers supporting women through divorce and other family law matters.